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#1 2011-11-04 20:05:03
I'm writing a story.
Chapter 1 - Fireclan
The people of the Fireclan hold the essence of fire. Many are skilled swordsmen, because you need fire to make a sword. Some become peaceful firemakers. A select few train in the arts of fire magic and become Fire Mages. Most do not live through training, but the ones that do become famous.
The Fireclan is most known for its dragons. Some of the Fire Mages can become Dragon Riders. They learn how to ride, train, and take care of dragons. By the age of 20 years, Fireclan members can train in the skills of their choice. From ages 10-19, they train in basic skills. At age 25, they can either join the Fire Army, or take more training in another catagory. Or, if they become a Fire Mage, they can spend 5 more years training in rider camp to become a Dragon Rider.
At the age of 7, they get their familiers, or the animals that follow them around, like a pet. If they pick a dragon, like most do, they have to go to dragon care camp for a year. Then they get an egg, and they have to take care of it until it reaches riding age (4 years old). On special request, the training camp can hold the dragon until the owner can go through mage and rider camp.
If they wish to become a firemaker, they learn basic fire spells, mostly ones that make a ball of fire. They keep the fire beacons and factories going.
_________
And that's where Ieft off.
Update: Removed textwall, made paragraphs, wrote another sentence.
Last edited by owetre18 (2011-11-05 18:38:10)
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#2 2011-11-04 20:05:50
- CheeseMunchy
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- Registered: 2008-10-13
- Posts: 1000+
Re: I'm writing a story.
ok....
6418,
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#3 2011-11-04 20:06:47
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#4 2011-11-04 20:16:48
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#5 2011-11-04 20:18:08
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#6 2011-11-04 20:22:12
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#9 2011-11-04 21:00:48
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#11 2011-11-04 21:17:19
- bananaman114
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- Registered: 2010-03-15
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Re: I'm writing a story.
Wickimen wrote:
No offense but there should be a more uh subtle way to slip in all this information
the sun still shines
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#12 2011-11-05 08:35:01
Re: I'm writing a story.
bananaman114 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
No offense but there should be a more uh subtle way to slip in all this information
It's just information on the clans. Later books will be real wars and stuff. This is more like Warriors: Code of the Clans
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#13 2011-11-05 10:02:30
- CheeseMunchy
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2008-10-13
- Posts: 1000+
Re: I'm writing a story.
owetre18 wrote:
U like?
ya I think I was offline
6418,
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#14 2011-11-05 10:20:06
Re: I'm writing a story.
CheeseMunchy wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
U like?
ya I think I was offline
Thanks. Or, just for TF2 Heavy fans, TANKS!
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#15 2011-11-05 10:38:54
- PlutoIsHades
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- Registered: 2010-10-18
- Posts: 1000+
Re: I'm writing a story.
I can't wait to read it, if you're gonna post it on Scratch! Sounds interesting!
Last edited by PlutoIsHades (2011-11-05 10:39:10)
Minecraft, Redwall, and Cyberchase fan, and PROUD.
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#16 2011-11-05 10:43:44
Re: I'm writing a story.
PlutoIsHades wrote:
I can't wait to read it, if you're gonna post it on Scratch! Sounds interesting!
It's gonna be hard to actually finish it.
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#17 2011-11-05 10:46:18
Re: I'm writing a story.
owetre18 wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
I can't wait to read it, if you're gonna post it on Scratch! Sounds interesting!
It's gonna be hard to actually finish it.
Yeah, I've started hundreds of stories, but I've only ever finished 2 
(not including the series of short stories about Goldie the Superdog). Which is why, even though I've got lots of ideas for other stories (specifically, Goldie and my fantasy story) I'm determined to finish Space Academy first. 
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#18 2011-11-05 10:54:07
- PlutoIsHades
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- Registered: 2010-10-18
- Posts: 1000+
Re: I'm writing a story.
calebxy wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
I can't wait to read it, if you're gonna post it on Scratch! Sounds interesting!
It's gonna be hard to actually finish it.
Yeah, I've started hundreds of stories, but I've only ever finished 2
I finish a lot of my stories, but then I can't figure out what I should revise, and I don't want my family to read it at that stage.
Minecraft, Redwall, and Cyberchase fan, and PROUD.
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#19 2011-11-05 10:55:58
Re: I'm writing a story.
PlutoIsHades wrote:
calebxy wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
It's gonna be hard to actually finish it.Yeah, I've started hundreds of stories, but I've only ever finished 2
I finish a lot of my stories, but then I can't figure out what I should revise, and I don't want my family to read it at that stage.
The problem with my stories (at least, with The Magic Bath 2) is that because it takes me so long to finish it, the writing style will often be a very different and a lot better at the end than it is at the beginning.
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#20 2011-11-05 11:20:48
Re: I'm writing a story.
calebxy wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
calebxy wrote:
Yeah, I've started hundreds of stories, but I've only ever finished 2I finish a lot of my stories, but then I can't figure out what I should revise, and I don't want my family to read it at that stage.
The problem with my stories (at least, with The Magic Bath 2) is that because it takes me so long to finish it, the writing style will often be a very different and a lot better at the end than it is at the beginning.
I can't wait to get the time to read SA. Where are chapters 1 and 2?
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#21 2011-11-05 11:28:05
- maxskywalker
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- Registered: 2008-01-27
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Re: I'm writing a story.
Interesting. I'm gonna guess that this is a mage who trains as a Dragon Rider, and his familiar is something that doesn't get along well with Dragons?
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#22 2011-11-05 11:28:53
Re: I'm writing a story.
owetre18 wrote:
calebxy wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
I finish a lot of my stories, but then I can't figure out what I should revise, and I don't want my family to read it at that stage.The problem with my stories (at least, with The Magic Bath 2) is that because it takes me so long to finish it, the writing style will often be a very different and a lot better at the end than it is at the beginning.
I can't wait to get the time to read SA. Where are chapters 1 and 2?
Here's chapter 1: http://scratch.mit.edu/forums/viewtopic.php?id=74240
And here is chapter 2: http://scratch.mit.edu/forums/viewtopic.php?id=77927
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#23 2011-11-05 11:46:50
- MoreGamesNow
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- Registered: 2009-10-12
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Re: I'm writing a story.
Wickimen wrote:
No offense but there should be a more uh subtle way to slip in all this information
I think what Wickimen means is that you're rushing a lot of information onto the reader in the opening paragraphs. A more subtle way to do it would be to introduce the information as the story progresses. Since you're eventually going to be going to your main character's story, you could introduce the information as he/she comes across it, and he/she would mention it in passing to the reader.
For example:
I wrote:
He saw a small seven-year-old scampering around his parents, undoubtedly excited at the prospect of choosing his familiar, but blissfully ignorant of the many needs an egg demands, and the the even more demanding nature of a young dragon.
"Cogito ergo sum" -- I think, therefore I am
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#24 2011-11-05 11:59:51
Re: I'm writing a story.
MoreGamesNow wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
No offense but there should be a more uh subtle way to slip in all this information
I think what Wickimen means is that you're rushing a lot of information onto the reader in the opening paragraphs. A more subtle way to do it would be to introduce the information as the story progresses. Since you're eventually going to be going to your main character's story, you could introduce the information as he/she comes across it, and he/she would mention it in passing to the reader.
For example:I wrote:
He saw a small seven-year-old scampering around his parents, undoubtedly excited at the prospect of choosing his familiar, but blissfully ignorant of the many needs an egg demands, and the the even more demanding nature of a young dragon.
Yeah basically
xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
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#25 2011-11-05 12:11:30
Re: I'm writing a story.
maxskywalker wrote:
Interesting. I'm gonna guess that this is a mage who trains as a Dragon Rider, and his familiar is something that doesn't get along well with Dragons?
Err, nope. It's a field guide to my upcoming series/rpg.
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