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#26 2011-02-22 00:36:07
Re: Show off your best jokes
one day adam saw someone else and so he said
"hi my name's adam"
and the other guy said
"hahah my names adam too"
and they shook hands but then they exploded because this is better said than written and adam=atom bluh bluh science
well that sorta fell apart
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#28 2011-02-22 10:36:52
- Alternatives
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2010-09-16
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
slapperbob wrote:
So, there's a kid at school.
The teacher asks: " Tell me the first five letters of the ABC's." "Uhhh... I don't know them." Said the kid. "Well go study them!"
So, he went home to his mom, who was on the phone, and asked: "Mom, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" "SHUTUP!" Yelled the mom.
Then, he went to his sister, who was listining to music. "Sally, what's the second letter of the alphabet?" Billy asked. "Uh-huh. Oh-yea. Uh-huh. Oh-yea. She said listining to music.
After that, Billy went to his brother, who was watching TV. He asked: "Sam, what's the third letter of the alphabet?" "Dun-nun-nun-nun-nun-nun-nun-nun, BAT-MAN!" Sam yelled.
Then, he went to his dad, who was taking out the trash. "Dad, what's the fourth letter of the alphabet?" "In the trash can, in the trash can!" Said his dad, throwing the bag in the can.
Finally, he went to his neibor's house, who was cooking burgurs.
Billy asked: "Mr. Thompson, what's the fifth letter of the alphabet?" " Honey, mah buns are burnin!" Mr. Thompson said.
Billy went back to school.
"I know the ABC's!" "Okay. Please say them." The teacher said.
"SHUTUP!" Billy said.
"*GASP* Do you want to go to the office, Mr.?"
"Uh-huh, Oh-yea. Uh-huh, Oh-yea." Billy said.
He went to the office.
"Who sent you here?" Asked the principle.
"Dun-nun-nun-nun-nun-nun-nun-nun, BAT-MAN!"
"Where do you live?"
"In the trash can, in the trash can!"
"Do you wanna get a spainging?!"
The principle spanked him right on his bottom.
"Honey, mah buns are burnin!" Billy said.
LOL
Well if you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say. I never want to let you down or have you go, it's better off this way.
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#29 2011-02-22 12:38:17
Re: Show off your best jokes
echs wrote:
blazerv82 wrote:
Mine is a very dirty joke.
The boy fell in the mud.did you take this from my dirty jokes TBG thread
anyways my best joke
well my best is inappropriate bu tmy second-best is okay
knock knock
who's there
no one
oh ok
No, I did not. It's more of a running joke in my family.
Unfortunately, all of my funny jokes are inside, and are too mature for Scratch....
Pretty Hate Machine, Broken, Closer To God, The Downward Spiral, Further Down The Spiral, The Perfect Drug, The Fragile, And All That Could Have Been, With Teeth, Year Zero, Y34RZ3R0R3M1X3D, Ghosts I-IV, The Slip, Pretty Hate Machine 2010
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#30 2011-02-22 16:24:56
- slapperbob
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-10-28
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
kayybee wrote:
Pretty good joke, I've heard it before, but I just don't know what a spainging is.
Whoops. I meant [i]spanking[i]. I fixed that. 
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#31 2011-02-22 16:41:03
- waveOSBeta
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-12-08
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
Faculty Bathroom
Gym shorts!
DON'T ASK. 
P.S. My water's better.
![http://internetometer.com/image/10202.png]](http://internetometer.com/image/10202.png])
New signature coming soon!
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#32 2011-02-22 16:44:25
- GarSkutherGirl
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-04-27
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
Kid 1: Mom, why is my name Rose?
Mom: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 2: Ma, why's my name Flower?
Mom: A flower fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: MMMJKSJHSKJL?
Mom: Shut up, Refrigerator.
Oh, the glory of it all - adorable cat people dressed as video game characters!
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#33 2011-02-22 16:46:17
- waveOSBeta
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-12-08
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
GarSkutherGirl wrote:
Kid 1: Mom, why is my name Rose?
Mom: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 2: Ma, why's my name Flower?
Mom: A flower fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: MMMJKSJHSKJL?
Mom: Shut up, Refrigerator.
xD
New signature coming soon!
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#34 2011-02-22 17:56:17
- Nexstudent
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2010-02-07
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
Jokes? JOKES? well... i am not funny... but here goes...
One cow says moo. The other cow says woof. the first cow says "why'd you say woof?" and then the other cow said "I was speaking a foreign language"
...
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he felt like it, sheesh.
...
A guy walks into a bar. He dies of blunt force trauma.
thats all i got.
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#35 2011-02-22 18:00:57
Re: Show off your best jokes
GarSkutherGirl wrote:
Kid 1: Mom, why is my name Rose?
Mom: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 2: Ma, why's my name Flower?
Mom: A flower fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: MMMJKSJHSKJL?
Mom: Shut up, Refrigerator.
Shouldn't kid 1 and 2 both be named Flower because a rose is a flower?
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#36 2011-02-22 18:06:03
- bananaman114
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2010-03-15
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
The banana tree will defeat the polar bear. The polar bear is evil.
Pingpong in elevators.
There.
Oh, wait, theres one more: "The snake. He's a smart one.".
Oh, and:" THE FISH DID IT!!!"
Yeah. Your not supposed to get it.
the sun still shines
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#37 2011-02-22 18:29:08
Re: Show off your best jokes
svinnik wrote:
GarSkutherGirl wrote:
Kid 1: Mom, why is my name Rose?
Mom: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 2: Ma, why's my name Flower?
Mom: A flower fell on your head when you were a baby.
Kid 3: MMMJKSJHSKJL?
Mom: Shut up, Refrigerator.Shouldn't kid 1 and 2 both be named Flower because a rose is a flower?
I can see naming my kid refrigerator, cinder block, moon, wall, stairs, AVRIL, cow, or even knife, but seriously, What kind of person names BOTH of their kids flower?
And kid 2's name is actually Daisy.
OldWeezerGeezer wrote:
What's brown and sticky?
O.o
GarSkurtherGirl wrote:
Kid 3: MMMJKSJHSKJL?
Actually, it's "aifoglogistischeenophticusofeoifhawehfiuehfio?" lol
I don't have very many good jokes. Like a lot of other people, they are either inside, dirty, racist, blonde, or just plain stupid.
Here's one from my buddy in first grade.
"What's green and really dangerous? A frog... but green. And it has a long tongue that swallows flies, and stuff. Oh, and it has a machine gun."
I lol'd, but not for the reason he wanted me to.
"I've worked so hard for you and you give me nothing in return. Do you need help... Or do I?"
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#38 2011-02-22 18:37:51
- GarSkutherGirl
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-04-27
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
ZQFMGB.
A worm. Found in New Guinea.
Oh, the glory of it all - adorable cat people dressed as video game characters!
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#39 2011-02-22 18:38:04
Re: Show off your best jokes
i just remembered some of the best jokes ever
whats worse than a cat stuck in a tree
two cats stuck in a tree
what does a white hat become when you put it in the red sea
wet
whats big and red and eats rocks
a big red rock eater
whats green and flies
SUPERPICKLE
im pretty sure there are more but whatever
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#40 2011-02-22 18:47:41
- GarSkutherGirl
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-04-27
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
What kind of flower gives the best kisses?
Tulips
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
Pete and Repeat are on a boat. Pete falls off. Who's left?
Repeat.
DON'T EVER answer 'Repeat'. Answer 'Re'.
Oh, the glory of it all - adorable cat people dressed as video game characters!
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#42 2011-02-22 18:54:19
- GarSkutherGirl
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-04-27
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
henley wrote:
Isn't Re the Egyptian sun god?
I'm not a historian.
Oh, the glory of it all - adorable cat people dressed as video game characters!
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#43 2011-02-22 18:55:30
- Kileymeister
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2008-04-17
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
henley wrote:
Isn't Re the Egyptian sun god?
That'd be Ra.
@TuffGhost: Two atoms joining does not create an explosion. You're thinking of splitting one atom.
Last edited by Kileymeister (2011-02-22 19:34:36)
I'm back, and showcasing two new* projects! Click left or right on the image below to see!
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#45 2011-02-22 19:44:41
- GarSkutherGirl
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-04-27
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
Kileymeister wrote:
henley wrote:
Isn't Re the Egyptian sun god?
That'd be Ra.
@TuffGhost: Two atoms joining does not create an explosion. You're thinking of splitting one atom.
Actually, it can if one doesn't have any positively charged particles.
Oh, the glory of it all - adorable cat people dressed as video game characters!
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#47 2011-02-23 00:35:55
- throughthefire
- Scratcher
- Registered: 2009-07-09
- Posts: 1000+
Re: Show off your best jokes
Stupid science joke time!
One atom says to the other: "Hey, I think I lost an electron"
The other replies: "Are you sure?"
"I'm positive!"
Ha ha (not) ha ha (not) ha ha
Back. For now. Maybe.
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#48 2011-02-23 00:40:56
Re: Show off your best jokes
Kileymeister wrote:
@TuffGhost: Two atoms joining does not create an explosion. You're thinking of splitting one atom.
whaaaaateverrrrrr
i told the joke really badly anyways
(if you were anyone but kiley id think you were just thinking about todays c&h)
Last edited by TuffGhost (2011-02-23 01:01:12)
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#49 2011-02-23 00:44:16
Re: Show off your best jokes
throughthefire wrote:
Stupid science joke time!
One atom says to the other: "Hey, I think I lost an electron"
The other replies: "Are you sure?"
"I'm positive!"
Ha ha (not) ha ha (not) ha ha
lol i saw that in my math textbook.
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#50 2011-02-23 00:56:11
Re: Show off your best jokes
waveOSBeta wrote:
bananaman114 wrote:
Ok, all the decent jokes I know are inside jokes...
THIS
+1
Meh, here's one. I know it's bad, but it's my best non-inside. Oh and, it's all one.
Q: Why'd the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the other side.
Q: Why'd the rooster cross the road?
A: It was the chicken's day off.
Q: Why'd the hen cross the road?
A: The rooster got fired.
Q: Why'd the chick cross the road?
A: Because the hen had to take care of the other chicks, so she sent her oldest out.
Q: Now why'd the chicken cross the road?
A: His vacation was over.
Q: Didn't you say it was a day off?
A: SHUT UP. IT'S CLOSE ENOUGH. >:U
Now only using this account to post in Miscellaneous, but when Miss_Webgal becomes a Scratcher I'm ditching this account.
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