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The Book of Jacoolism

In the beginning there was nothing, but suddenly there was a huge explosion which created everything in the universe.
In day one the first creatures appeared on the earth, and through the years the creatures evolved into many different species.
One of the weakest were the men, they had evolved from the monkeys and they had nothing they had no fight skills nor any big muscles.
The men ate only small bugs and plants.
But one day a man who was much smarter than any other, came to earth.
He came from a distant planet and his name was Jacool.
He landed in a place located today’s US in a city called Moab.
He helped the other men to communicate with each other and he taught them how to catch bigger animals and how to defend themselves.
The men were now almost as smart as Jacool and they started to build villages.
To thank Jacool they invented a new sauce which they called ‘barbecue sauce’ because it tasted very good with barbecued meat.
Jacool was very happy with his success but there was one thing…
Some of the humans used their brains for very evil purposes.
Of course Jacool allowed the people to do evil thing sometimes, but not this evil…
The men started killing each other and they divided the world into countries.
Jacool thought that he had to stop what was happening and he asked his friends on the other planets for help.
Jacool’s friends moved the people on their planets to earth so that they all could help the people together; they never had to help the other animals though since they already understood their rules.
Jacool and his friends started making guidelines for the humans and when they had finished they sent them to the human’s brains.
Most of the humans started to follow the guidelines and lived in peace but there were some who didn’t follow them.
As the population grew the evil humans became more and more too.
Jacool and his friends knew that they couldn’t do anything about it; but they hoped that the good people on earth would lock up the bad people.

Jacool and his friends were getting older and they knew that he hadn’t got much time left.
Jacool was transformed into a spiritual state, and he got the name ‘The Ol’ Almighty Jacoolicus’

Jacool’s friends, MyRedNeptune - the empress of Neptune, Paddle2see - the wizard of Mars and
The-Whiz - the wizard of Mercury , also transformed into spirits.



The Holy Guidelines:
1.     Thou shalt live your life as you want, but without breaking any of the guidelines                mentioned below.
2.    Thou shalt not kill another human.
3.    Thou shalt not rob or steal.
4.    Thou shalt treat others as you would like to be treated – Mentioned by the ol’ wizard, Paddle2see.
5.    Thou shalt be careful about the environment.
6.    Thou shalt (sometimes) practice random acts of evil – Mentioned by the empress   of Neptune MyRedNeptune


This was a brief introduction to Jacoolism...


Mini Stories
Samurai768's Story:
Jacoolicus was meditating, when a young girl came to watch. She was curious and started meditating too. She was so consentrated in meditating, that she became surrounded by glowing red lights which spelled out her new name, Samurai768, because she has forgotten her other. These are the pixies of CoolestLand, which crowned her the Goddess of Awesomeness. They taught her the ways of a ninja, how to control the power of pizza, and how to beat people at video games. Jacoolicus was jealous, and destroyed the land. but somewhere, there is an ancient ruin, *Cough, my street,COUGH* and she still practises these acient ritules.
Sadly, the pixies are on vacation to Ohio, but will be back on tuesday next week XD

Steppenwulf's Story:
Approximatly 2012 years after Jacoolism was born, Jacoolius decided he needed a way to eternaly punish evil mortals. Thus, steppenwulf invented a little thing called death. Jacoolius aproved of this method of punishment, and nammed steppenwulf the Deathmeister. Now steppenwulf's name strikes fear into the heart of evil mortals, as he drives around earth in his Lamborghini Reventon, looking for mortals to kill.

Staraptor's Story:
3000 years after Jacool became the ruler of the universe, there was a man named Staraptor, a lover of birds. The birds inspired him to become a scribe, where he wrote the Book of Jacoolisim, a book containing all the tales of heroes, villans, lessons, and history. Sadly, it has not been published to the internet. We pray to jacool for him to do it.

FloatingMagicTree's Story:
Then the almighty floatingmagictree created all vegetation as we know it. He suddenly appeared out of nowhere in the form of a tiny seed, then grew and spread his awesomeness everywhere. His first creation was the mango, which is now a fruit that is loved by many people. He then created the potato. He then started to create others much like him, the results being fellow Redwood trees, Oak, Maple, Elm, and others. His last creation, made about 2 million years ago, was the Venus Flytrap, a plant that eats meat. He regards it as his most bizarre creation.

Samurai768's Story for Adventurest1:
The sun goddess, pinkpiggy237, was playing around with her sister, adventurest1, when it became very dark and they could not play anymore. Adventurest1 was alone and sad, sitting behind one of the bushes. She took some of her bright light (which could only work at day) and put a spell on it so it would stay bright ALL day and night. She gave this to adventurest1, and they played and played until they got very tired. She couldnt sleep because it was too bright, so she cast a spell on her, making her only as bright as she needed to be. So, as Jacoolicus found this out, he named adventurest1 the goddess of the moon, their newest creation for the earth.

Webgal15's Stories About Lanas And Lani:
Lani had just turned six. You would think that she would be celebrating, but instead, her father stopped hunting and told Lani to do it. She had no prior training, but the worst part was that she loved animals. Her parents knew it. On Lani's first day, she decided that she would run away. Soon, she found Lanas. They talked for a while (and learned that they both thought Jacoolicus was very good), and fell in love. Now, the couple is an important part of the Jacoolic religion.

Lanas was young; about six years old. He had heard many stories about Jacoolicus. The ones that were about good things about him he believed, and the ones about bad things he did not. His parents did not agree with him, however. Because of this, they kicked Lanas out of the house. For many long nights, he was sleeping outside, living on leaves and rain water. One day, a young girl named Lani found him. She believed that Jacoolicus was good, too. She was also about six years old, too. The two children talked for a while and fell in love. Now, the couple is an important part of the Jacoolic religion.

Today, the 'awesome awesomeness' is when you do this:

1. Go on the edge of something that isn't too high (so you live) and isn't too low (so it's awesome)
2. Put your hand up and look like you're shooting a flare gun
3. Jump off backwards
4. KEEP THAT HAND UP
5. See what happens. The higher up you are, the more likely it is for you to fall down and not slide back.

Well, this is how it got invented. Lani was 26. Lanas was killed a year ago. Everything was fine before then. Then, Lani's life was turning bad. She couldn't take it anymore. So she climbed to the top of a skyscraper. It was late at night, so she was already in her pajamas. She shot a flare gun, and then jumped backwards. When she landed, she died. Many people watched it. The kids who don't follow 'don't try this at home' did it at home, but not as high as Lani did. They thought it felt awesome. And that is how the awesome awesomeness was invented.

A few days after Lanas and Lani met, Jacoolicus heard about the couple. He notified them, saying that they have to pass on the names 'Lanas' and 'Lani'. And when they grew up and had 2 children, one being a boy and one being a girl, they did just as Jacoolicus said. The boy was named 'Lanas', and the girl was named 'Lani'. The names were passed on for centuries. Although now, the tradition is being neglected. Even the child of the present, who is also called webgal15, has not been named 'Lani'. To her, it's a nickname.

Djm111's Story:
Jacoolicus realised that the world was in decline. Children were raised badly and were ending up going to war riding rocking horses, wielding bottles and pacifiers as deadly weapons with the grace of an arthritic duck.
Getting together with several of his mortal underlings, he concocted a scheme to bring all the children to their senses. He formed several small companies dedicated to creating nonexistent environments where the children could let out their inner emotions without milk being spilled and wasted.
   Thus, videogames were born. These were designed to give children stress relief, a sense of accomplishment, and the occasional seizure. However little has changed since their release. The only notable difference is that they ride Ponyta into battle now.

Big-Bang's Story:

Genesis

On the first day, Jacoolicus was bored. So he created the world. On the second day, he created some oceans and trees. On the third day, he made idiots and has never gotten around to fixing that mistake. On the fourth day, he finally made normal people who whacked the idiots with the sticks and heavy artillery Jacoolicus generously provided. And on the fifth day, he finally got around to making little things like Castforms to keep the weather all random.

The Punishment of the Castforms

After being created, Castforms ran wild and scattered all over the globe, bringing extremely silly weather with them as they traveled. After crops had been set aflame by a particularly sunny day, they would then be flash-flooded as the move Rain Dance came into effect. Tornadoes ripped across fields and lightning struck everything that was strike-able. So Jacoolicus destroyed all but four of the Castforms, and each one only was released from its bonds for three months a year.

Last edited by jacool (2009-11-08 12:34:09)