Scratch

so now what are we doing? waiting for Rarse to join?
then we should recruit Crystal
then the actual book :3

Waffle27 wrote:

destructo-serpent wrote:

so now what are we doing? waiting for Rarse to join?
then we should recruit Crystal
then the actual book :3

Yay!!! Since your an Editor, you can combine up the suspenseful bits for the prolouge. If you need anny help, I can help. I don't consider myself an Editor because I'm not good at finding the grammer/spelling mistakes, but this kind of stuff I can help with if you need any.

k.

I can't wait to get to the actual book 

I wonder if we have any fans yet, or we won't get any until the book is released...

to find the suspensful parts, do we have all the prologue parts in one place on thee wiki?

slight problem. i'm not sure where to draw the line between Rarse's prologue and his chapter 1

i have Coil's on my flash drive, and i'll root thru all these posts to find the others 

Last edited by destructo-serpent (2013-03-20 22:36:52)

Rarse's

The sun was shining outside the window when Rarse awoke. He swam out of his clam shell groggily, not fully comprehending what was going on around him. He rubbed his eyes and opened them again, and gasped with horror as he looked above.
A dark shape slid across the surface of the water far above. Mer-people were fleeing the city, and families hid in their sea kelp houses.
Rarse watched in awed fascination as web like shapes fell from the craft. He was pulled to the side as one fell over him, and he turned to see his father, Grupt.
"Don't touch the nets!" he commanded before swimming quickly away. Rarse looked to the side and saw one of the nets fold around a mermaid, she screamed and tried to escape, but to no avail. More fell everywhere, and black ooze drifted from the giant shape.
Another net fell close to Rarse, and he bravely swam under it, ready to face the enemy. But the ropes caught his tail, him arms, his head. He struggled, but it grew tighter. Throwing punches, he tried to weave his way out but to know avail. Yells echoed around him, a flash of silver, and the net fell apart. There was his father again, holding a knife. Rarse recognized it as the one made from the shell of a clam, Grupt had spent hours sharpening the knife, grinding it against the stones to perfection.
"Go!" he yelled, and as Rarse shot away, a net covered Grupt's body also. He tried to cut the ropes with his knife, but it fell from his hand and floated away as the net began rising to the surface.
Rarse swam in circles, destruction all around him. He didn't know which way to go, which way to turn. "Run!" Grupt was still fighting the net, but it began floating upward faster and faster, pulled by a taut rope.
"Get to the stone arch near the walls of the city! Get out before they have you!"
And then he was gone. Too near the surface for Rarse to hear his frantic commands any longer. Too near the surface for Rarse to ever see him again.
Crying all around him, thick black liquid flooding the streets, Rarse swam through the city as fast as he could, dodging the spidery nets landing on houses and mer-people. Reaching the city gate, he looked back one more time, this was his home, where he'd lived with his father for years since his mother died. He couldn't leave the place he'd known as a child. It all seemed so abrupt and unexpected, and Rarse stayed floating on the spot. But his father's last words echoed in his mind, and he turned and swam off toward the stone arch into the vastness of the ocean without looking back.
As he swam, he heard a sound in the distance, a pleading cry. And it wasn't coming from his village. He swam faster, not noticing his shirt catching on the a spiky plant until he was tugged backwards.
Most mermen didn't wear shirts, as they clinged on to their wet skin, but Rarse felt strangely exposed swimming down the streets without one, so he'd always taken to light blue and green cloth, which had been woven from the village weavers into a fine shirt.
Rarse pulled backwards, his tail straining as it propelled him away from the plant, and the shirt snapped. Rarse groaned in disappointment before hearing the cry again. Closer. Shooting off again, he folded his ripped shirt over the tear and continued on his way.
Upon reaching the source, he quickly hid behind a large stone inwardly gasped. A shark! Peeking past the rock again, the sight took his breath away. Teeth glistening maliciously, the shark was chomping wildly and ferociously, but that wasn't what surprised him. A giant sea monster was battling the shark, his scales shining blue and green like the colors of Rarse's shirt. A Selkie was cutting spiky weeds that were trapping a Hippocampi. They succeeded quickly and the shark soon retreated.

Foul black water filled the salty sea of Bual, tainting the usual sweet scent of Epher’s home with an unnatural smell. Hovering above the village, a great metal whale, with thin flippers, danced above his head. It was bleeding the opaque fluid.
    “Don’t gaze at it too long,” warned Moria, Epher’s mother. “Dozens of rare Kelpie villages have been destroyed by its reeking blood.  I don’t intend Bual to be one of those villages.”
    “Its flippers,” Epher whispered, entranced. “The whale’s flippers have so many gaping holes. What happened to it to make it so mortally wounded?”
    Moria let out an ironic barking laugh. “Whale! No, no, this is another breed, called a Ship. I believe this particular animal is a ‘Fishing Vessel’. Cruel humans force them to catch us in their flippers, or choke us with their blood-specifically called ‘Oil’.”
    “How do you know so much about humans?” asked Epher curiously.
    “I have been up to the human world. It is cruel there, so very cruel.” Moria shuddered. “Collect your father, Epher, and your sister. We shall break out of this village before it breaks us.” Epher nodded, deciding not to question his mother’s orders.
    “Father!” he cried. “Sister!” Sleek, frightened bodies pushed past his as he tried to make his way upstream, to the last place he had seen his father and sister. Stinky “Oil” filled his nostrils, threatening to drown him in his own element. Why didn’t he just give up? Run away? “That’s not what families do,” he muttered through gritted teeth. “I can’t give up. How could I survive without my family there to support me?”
    Empty, black water greeted him when he reached the other side of the mass of bodies. Crying out, Epher searched the sea floor rapidly. Where—where was his family? He wasn’t going to leave without them.
Then, out of the corner of his vision, Epher spotted two motionless shapes. “Oh, Great Neptune, no!” he wailed, swimming over to the bodies. The sight confirmed his fears. Epher’s father and sister were dead.
“Moria!” Epher cried. “Mother, where are you?” The black blood was shrouding his vision. Catching a glimpse of a retreating tail ahead, Epher quickly followed, coughing, eyes watering.
Stumbling as he did so, Epher gasped for fresh, clean, saltwater. There was none. Every corner was filled with the putrid liquid. There was nowhere to turn, no way to escape the masses and masses of oil.
And then he was captured.

An invisible foe was clutching him in a strong, firm grip. “Let go of me!” he cried, recognizing his capturer as the Fishing Vessel’s fin.
Already, his head was becoming less furry, more human, and unable to take the pressure of the water as the fin brought him closer to the surface. Thrashing wildly in his hopes to escape, Epher didn’t notice as oil leaked into his eyes, his mouth, his nostrils, choking him discreetly in his determination to escape.
    Air bubbles leaked from his nostrils, almost human eyes rolled back in his head. “Help…Help me,” he whispered. As he spoke, more of the Oil rushed into his mouth, running down the back of his throat, causing it to burn.
    Suddenly, a familiar chestnut brown body was knocking against the side of the net, squirming through the hole, making it just big enough for her pup to fit through. Epher tried to get into a position where he could fit easily through, but was cramped by the fallen bodies of his fellow villagers. “Mom!” he cried.
    Epher struggled in the fin, and watched as Moria dived through the hole, into the netting. Her sleek body fit through the hole perfectly. Positioning herself behind Epher, she began to shove him towards the hole. “Get out!” she said. “If the humans catch you, they will kill you!”
    Breaking free of the flipper, Epher turned to help his mother. It was too late. The fin was already out of the water. “Moria!” he screamed, tears cascading down his cheeks.
    “Be strong, young one,” Moria called.  “Break free and survive! Always remember Bual’s fate!” And with those words, Epher’s mother was gone.

The new mother gazed down at her filly. She was floating near her mother's tail, sleeping peacefully. The mother sighed. Little Amaya's father had disappeared after she announced that they would soon be parents. This made her life extremely difficult, as avoiding humans while carrying around a large pearl egg in hooves is not an easy task. 



Most Hippocampi would create a nest, and leave their egg there until it hatched. The problem with this family is that they were far out into sea, and baby Hippocampi need to hatch in warm, shallow water.



At least Amaya was safe. Her dark brown fur melded into brown scales, which turned to an iridescent blue, and finally, to white. Her tail fin was a blinding white, with silver stripes. This worried the mother, as white attracted the eye, and Amaya needed to be able to hide. 



The dreaded humans hunted Cryptids… If they caught her... Who knows what they would do. 



As if to answer this question, the sound of divers swimming through the water caught her attention. The mother awoke Amaya, "Amaya, Amaya, go, quickly, through the escape! Don't come back, they'll catch you. Find other Cryptids!"



Amaya's were opened wide, her blue eyes showing confusion and fear. The mother nuzzled her child, and gently said, "I will always love you. This means you must go, the humans are coming here."



The little filly seemed to understand her mother was protecting her from danger, no matter how heartbreaking it caused both of them. Amaya swam towards the small hole in the cave wall, the opposite direction of the humans. She wriggled through the hole, and broke free into the sea. 



Above her she could see the night sky. She continued further into the sea, keeping her mothers word in her head.

"Escape. Don't come back. Find other Cryptids. I will always love you."



Amaya swam through the waters for what seemed like hours. She used her tail find most of the time, and used her hooves for changing direction. 



Hours grew into days, days to weeks, weeks to months. She had been relying on the sympathy of ocean life to eat and find temporary shelter from predators. It had been three years since her mother's capture, since her life turned into chaos and... And a mess. Three years was a long time for a hippocampus, in fact, she would be considered an adult.

Amaya kept moving on though, she had to find others.
Eventually, the Cryptid felt the water grow colder then ever before, yet, she seemed safer. She tentatively edged forward, and suddenly felt herself sucked into a strong, warm current. She tried to fight the raging water, but she crashed into a large red and grey stone, and blacked out.



Amaya opened her eyes, slowly, and looked around. Everything was... Distorted. Blurry. Slowly everything became clearer. Suddenly, she blinked, she had to be dreaming.

Less than five minutes swimming away, were other Cryptids.

~
Here ^

Er, I posted the prologue, not the first chapter 

Hm...Maybe you could word it differently Shadow? Or say, just under a mile away, if she swims a mile in about 5 or 6 minutes.

Waffle27 wrote:

This is sort of random, but I found another wiki list of Cryptids, mainly land. Here it is:
Land Cryptids

I am gonna put it in the Check out these Links section in case anyone needs it for future books. I know I will. I would put the sea one in the links, but since we have already developed the characters....

i won't need it. i already developed my Continent crusaders characters. his name is Exealtaet. 

how about we change "Ocean Explorers" to "sea searchers"?

destructo-serpent wrote:

Waffle27 wrote:

This is sort of random, but I found another wiki list of Cryptids, mainly land. Here it is:
Land Cryptids

I am gonna put it in the Check out these Links section in case anyone needs it for future books. I know I will. I would put the sea one in the links, but since we have already developed the characters....

i won't need it. i already developed my Continent crusaders characters. his name is Exealtaet. 

how about we change "Ocean Explorers" to "sea searchers"?

Sea Searchers...   That has an alliteration like the others, so that will work, better even!
Argghh...I have no idea which to do for my CC character!!
Nice name...Exealtaet.
Do you have your High Flier yet? I do. Her name is going to be Phena the Pheonix.

Waffle27 wrote:

destructo-serpent wrote:

Waffle27 wrote:

This is sort of random, but I found another wiki list of Cryptids, mainly land. Here it is:
Land Cryptids

I am gonna put it in the Check out these Links section in case anyone needs it for future books. I know I will. I would put the sea one in the links, but since we have already developed the characters....

i won't need it. i already developed my Continent crusaders characters. his name is Exealtaet. 

how about we change "Ocean Explorers" to "sea searchers"?

Sea Searchers...   That has an alliteration like the others, so that will work, better even!
Argghh...I have no idea which to do for my CC character!!
Nice name...Exealtaet.
Do you have your High Flier yet? I do. Her name is going to be Phena the Pheonix.

i like long names for my characters. then i can use an awesome nickname     
can you guess what he is?

i'm going to work on my high Flier. i know it's going to be a griffin, but i can't think of anything else.

Last edited by destructo-serpent (2013-03-20 23:37:09)

destructo-serpent wrote:

Numo's is kind of a prologue/chapter 1 mix. 

"But his father's last words echoed in his mind, and he turned and swam off toward the stone arch into the vastness of the ocean without looking back."
I think that would be a good place to end the prolouge, if we get Numo's consent.