Scratch

RoguePhantom01 · 2012-11-10 13:03:24

Just for fun, I've decided to make an adaption of the popular creepypasta 'Jeff the Killer'. This is what I have so far:

Jeff the Killer: The Play!

Scene One: Thomas and Martha enter stage right. They sit down on two chairs and Thomas opens a newspaper.

Thomas: Hey, Martha?

Martha: Hmm?

Thomas: There’s been another one.

Martha: Another one? How many have there been?

Thomas: Not sure… about a dozen, but here’s a boy who says someone attacked him last night.

Martha: Drops her book and looks straight at the man, shocked. What?

Thomas: Nods. Yup. Woke up and the window was open. He closed it and felt someone was watching him. Then in bed, this guy with huge eyes told him to go to sleep. They struggled and the neighbours called the cops. The man got away.

Martha: That's awful. Yawns. I’m going to bed.

Thomas: Martha, I don’t mean to put you on edge, but this happened just down the street. That Jimmy Antonucci kid. There is silence between them.

Martha: Just… lock the doors and windows when you come upstairs, just… please. Martha walks off stage left.

Thomas: Wait, Martha, I forgot to tell you something… Martha? Martha? Hey, can you say something? Thomas walks off stage left. Martha? Martha, where are y- Oh my gosh... oh my… Martha… Help! Someone help! Someone call the poli- AAAAAHHHHHH!!! The scream is cut off abruptly. Jeff walks on stage left.

Jeff: Heh heh… heh… that was… fun. Police sirens sound. Jeff runs off stage right.

End of Scene One.

Last edited by RoguePhantom01 (2012-11-19 18:48:54)

RoguePhantom01 · 2012-11-19 17:43:22

Bump de bump bump.

generosity · 2012-11-19 18:37:35

Is this really appropriate for scratch?
Not to mention the plot is contrived to say the least.

Firedrake969 · 2012-11-19 18:49:47

generosity wrote:
Is this really appropriate for scratch?
Not to mention the plot is contrived to say the least.

It is. I think.

RoguePhantom01 · 2012-11-19 18:52:27

generosity wrote:
Is this really appropriate for scratch?
Not to mention the plot is contrived to say the least.

1. I'm just going to imply excessive violence. Since it's an adaption, things will be changed, deaths will happen offstage. It's going to be toned down a lot.
2. Well... how am I going to fit in the beginning of the story? I can't just have the narrator reading the whole passage out!

Last edited by RoguePhantom01 (2012-11-19 18:58:53)

generosity · 2012-11-19 18:59:55

I was thinking more along the lines of a basic concept change.

RoguePhantom01 · 2012-11-19 19:05:40

As in changing the story a little? The play is going to expand upon the pasta. New characters, more plot points...

generosity · 2012-11-19 19:13:54

As in not writing a play about a (poorly written) horror story.
I'm sorry, but I just do not like horror stories! (especially poorly written ones)

RoguePhantom01 · 2012-11-19 19:19:54

Of course I know it's poorly written, I know it has enough grammar and spelling errors to make an english teacher's head spin, that why I like it. It's so bad it's good, narmy to the point of being hilarious. It may seem confusing and pointless, but sometimes reading awful stories are fun! (My Immortal, Maradonia, etc.)

Last edited by RoguePhantom01 (2012-11-19 19:23:29)

generosity · 2012-11-19 19:21:33

I don't think a story about a young child being (among other things) tortured into being a psychopath could ever be humorous, no matter how badly it's written.

RoguePhantom01 · 2012-11-19 19:25:35

Oh... erm... Black comedy?

Let's- let's get back on topic here, shall we? Okay, this has ended badly for me, perhaps I should delete this thread...

Any constructive criticism?

Last edited by RoguePhantom01 (2012-11-19 19:30:20)

Scratch

archived forums

#1 2012-11-10 13:03:24

Jeff the Killer Play Script

#2 2012-11-19 17:43:22

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#3 2012-11-19 18:37:35

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#4 2012-11-19 18:49:47

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

generosity wrote:

#5 2012-11-19 18:52:27

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

generosity wrote:

#6 2012-11-19 18:59:55

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#7 2012-11-19 19:05:40

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#8 2012-11-19 19:13:54

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#9 2012-11-19 19:19:54

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#10 2012-11-19 19:21:33

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

#11 2012-11-19 19:25:35

Re: Jeff the Killer Play Script

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