It gets really boring sitting in the back row when your classmates can't figure out how to square (x+y)(x-y).
Here's part of it:
Captain Kog (better name desperately needed) skillfully landed the USS Incomprehensible on a small, uncivilized alien planet which revolves around the star Sol named "Earth" by the inhabitants. He leaned back to admire his new surroundings, pressing a discreet yellow button to open a mechanical window in front of him. At that moment, he realized the surroundings didn't quite look right.
Captain Kog was an experienced captain. Having run the USS Incomprehensible for a good 15 years now, he knew exactly what to do. He calmly called his second-in-command, Copilot Zog. (again, names are desperately needed)
"Zog, what do you see over there?"
"Sir, it appears to be a window."
"Fair enough," replied Kog, who was used to Zog's practical interpretation of life, "what do you see outside the window?"
Zog considered this. He never bothered looking out windows. He always knew he had better things to do in life. Looking at the situation now, though, he realized he didn't have anything better to do. So he looked out the window.
"It appears to be a desert. There is a cactus not 20 feet from your window."
"And what does that tell you?"
Zog decided against pointing out that cacti lack vocal chords, and instead took the figurative meaning.
"Well, the fact that a cactus could survive in this vast desert, with minimal water and sweltering heat all year round, is really mindblowing. It is truly a miracle of nature how life will adapt no matter what," he replied.
"How true!" remarked Kog, staring out the window at the blinding ocean of sand in front of him. It reminded him of home. "Anything else?"
"Yes, Sir. We seem to have taken a wrong turn somewhere, this doesn't look a BIT like New York City."
Last edited by Hardmath123 (2012-09-26 06:47:39)
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Nice humour
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jji7skyline wrote:
Nice humour
Thanks, I really needed a break from muddling through boring equations; what better way than to write something funny?
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mythbusteranimator wrote:
I feel sorry for you. Slow classes are horrible.
Yeah. It's like the subjects you rock at go too slow the the ones you don't grok whatsoever go at warp 2.
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Hardmath123 wrote:
mythbusteranimator wrote:
I feel sorry for you. Slow classes are horrible.Yeah. It's like the subjects you rock at go too slow the the ones you don't grok whatsoever go at warp 2.
Yeah.
That's why I always browse Chrome during my online classes.
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mythbusteranimator wrote:
Hardmath123 wrote:
mythbusteranimator wrote:
I feel sorry for you. Slow classes are horrible.Yeah. It's like the subjects you rock at go too slow the the ones you don't grok whatsoever go at warp 2.
Yeah.
That's why I always browse Chrome during my online classes.
I play fruit ninja on my iPad.
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You're hilarious.
PS: ((x+y)(x-y))^2 = (x^2 - y^2)^2 = x^4 - 2(xy)^2 + y^4
Did i get it right?
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scimonster wrote:
You're hilarious.
PS: ((x+y)(x-y))^2 = (x^2 - y^2)^2 = x^4 - 2(xy)^2 + y^4
Did i get it right?
Nice!
Last edited by Hardmath123 (2012-09-24 09:20:05)
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Hardmath123 wrote:
mythbusteranimator wrote:
Hardmath123 wrote:
Yeah. It's like the subjects you rock at go too slow the the ones you don't grok whatsoever go at warp 2.Yeah.
That's why I always browse Chrome during my online classes.I play fruit ninja on my iPad.
Ah.
Nice.
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Bump. I tried writing a sequel today, but the math teacher gave me a huge worksheet to wade through...
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Lol
I like the names , they're simple and amusing except... I'd change captain wog's name, it is an offensive word. Maybe Qog or Pickle?
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Whisperfur wrote:
it is an offensive word
It is? Really? Oops, I'll change it.
EDIT: Now he's captain Kog.
Last edited by Hardmath123 (2012-09-26 06:48:39)
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Nice story! Last year I always sat in the far corner in the back of the room with my friend and we just draw little pictures in our notebooks sometimes since we didn't understand squat with that teacher anyway XD
My friend drew the teacher in marker on her paper and the teacher passed by our spots and luckily he didn't notice
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CylonToast wrote:
we just draw little pictures in our notebooks
This is what I do whenever I have to take notes.
Anyway, I liked the story. Was funny. Make moar.
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Hardmath123 wrote:
(better name desperately needed)
quog and plog
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Great job! Humor is surprising and funny, and I am curious about where the story is going after this.
Just make sure you don't miss anything important because you're not paying attention.
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PlutoIsHades wrote:
Great job! Humor is surprising and funny, and I am curious about where the story is going after this.
Just make sure you don't miss anything important because you're not paying attention.
Thanks!
What do you expect me to miss?
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Hardmath123 wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
Great job! Humor is surprising and funny, and I am curious about where the story is going after this.
Just make sure you don't miss anything important because you're not paying attention.Thanks!
What do you expect me to miss?
You're welcome.
Well, I don't know what you guys are learning in math class, but just don't miss anything new by accident.
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PlutoIsHades wrote:
Hardmath123 wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
Great job! Humor is surprising and funny, and I am curious about where the story is going after this.
Just make sure you don't miss anything important because you're not paying attention.Thanks!
What do you expect me to miss?You're welcome.
Well, I don't know what you guys are learning in math class, but just don't miss anything new by accident.
Oh, don't worry; I always do all this stuff once I'm totally done with all my exercises (which honestly takes me 5 minutes max).
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Hardmath123 wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
Hardmath123 wrote:
Thanks!
What do you expect me to miss?You're welcome.
Well, I don't know what you guys are learning in math class, but just don't miss anything new by accident.Oh, don't worry; I always do all this stuff once I'm totally done with all my exercises (which honestly takes me 5 minutes max).
Wow, you must be great at maths D: I try really hard and this kid still always beats me.
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Whisperfur wrote:
Hardmath123 wrote:
PlutoIsHades wrote:
You're welcome.
Well, I don't know what you guys are learning in math class, but just don't miss anything new by accident.Oh, don't worry; I always do all this stuff once I'm totally done with all my exercises (which honestly takes me 5 minutes max).
Wow, you must be great at maths D: I try really hard and this kid still always beats me.
Then again, math isn't exactly a contest :p
Anyway, I like the story it is quite amusing
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