Scratch

THE KING LIKES TO KILL
A 1 Act Play Written by soupoftomato

(Open in a meadow with fields seen in the distance. It’s a sunny day with few clouds.)

KING: (offstage) Once upon a time I found myself a rather unfitting king to a country that was rather unfitting of me.

(in song, onstage)
   
    They each had merely one thumb
    And as well they were all very dumb
    But I was smart
    And the food was tart
    Though I prefer sweet
    And sometimes meat

    How could I rule if I hated this place?
    Run them out with a sword and mace?
    No that was too mean, I want be nice
    Perhaps I could just freeze them in ice?

(several peasants walk onstage and begin a latin chorus)

    BLAAAA
    GAAABLAAFRITAAAA

(latin chorus ends, and peasants walk off stage)

KING: Well! If that’s how they feel about ME and I don’t particularly like them either, why must I be ruler here? Does not anyone else wish to take the throne I was so forced into? (sigh) Well, I guess I must attend to my duties still, whether I like it or not. (Stomps offstage)

SERVANT TO THE KING: (walks on stage) Things haven’t been the same since the new king! I do much more work now and my area of land is even smaller than before! If I was king here, I bet I would be better than all the previous ones!

(scene switches to inside the castle)

KING: I must find a unique identity for myself as a ruler! But what?

HAIRSTYLIST: (as she seems to be styling the King’s hair) I don’t know, sir. You’ll have to figure it out for yourself.

KING: Hmm, (pause to think), I’ve never really enjoyed life. (pause again) I’VE GOT IT!

(scene goes to the busy village, where peasants yield wide passages for the king)

PEASANTS: (all murmur in surprise at the king’s appearance)

KING: MAKE WAY, MAKE WAY, or I may just draw this sword by my hip! I really have no patience to spare today.

(peasants bustle back indoors amongst gasps and screams)

(scene goes to the meadow, where the Servant remains)

SERVANT: MY KING! I have been doing nothing but my duties for the past 10 hours! May I have even a bit of rest?

KING: NO! Because I’ve found my calling! It will give me a name as a king for sure!

SERVANT: What is it, my lord? Friendliness, empathy?

KING: I LIKE TO KILL!

(close curtains)

Last edited by soupoftomato (2012-08-22 21:05:30)