Nobody wants to read about somebody who's better then them
they want characters to either be physically weak but emotionally strong
or emotionally weak but physically strong (probably not though!)
or
relate-able but strong in every aspect
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Was a genious pyrotechnic really needed? :S
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Laternenpfahl wrote:
Was a genious pyrotechnic really needed? :S
Yes.
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bananaman114 wrote:
Nobody wants to read about somebody who's better then them
they want characters to either be physically weak but emotionally strong
or emotionally weak but physically strong (probably not though!)
or
relate-able but strong in every aspect
I don't care. Now do you have any comments on the story itself?
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Does anyone have any comments on the actual story!?!
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analytic wrote:
calebxy wrote:
Does anyone have any comments on the actual story!?!
You may like to include more description and slightly less dialogue, as the pace of the story is confusing and varied.
The dialogue is needed. And as I said, I haven't found much opportunity for where I can put the description.
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I've added a few paragraphs more.
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Not bad, better than about 97% of the people I know (their writing-- It can't be described how horrible it is) .
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majormax wrote:
Not bad, better than about 97% of the people I know (their writing-- It can't be described how horrible it is) .
lol; I'll take that as a compliment.
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majormax wrote:
(their writing-- It can't be described how horrible it is) .
Wrong you are.
Everything can be described as better than My Immortal.
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soupoftomato wrote:
majormax wrote:
(their writing-- It can't be described how horrible it is) .
Wrong you are.
Everything can be described as better than My Immortal.
What's that?
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calebxy wrote:
soupoftomato wrote:
majormax wrote:
(their writing-- It can't be described how horrible it is) .
Wrong you are.
Everything can be described as better than My Immortal.What's that?
Spare yourself
Don't look it up
(It's the worst fanfic ever written just don't read it)
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Wickimen wrote:
calebxy wrote:
soupoftomato wrote:
Wrong you are.
Everything can be described as better than My Immortal.What's that?
Spare yourself
Don't look it up
(It's the worst fanfic ever written just don't read it)
Err... ok. But what is it a fanfic of?
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calebxy wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
calebxy wrote:
What's that?Spare yourself
Don't look it up
(It's the worst fanfic ever written just don't read it)Err... ok. But what is it a fanfic of?
Harry Potter
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Wickimen wrote:
calebxy wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
Spare yourself
Don't look it up
(It's the worst fanfic ever written just don't read it)Err... ok. But what is it a fanfic of?
Harry Potter
Oh. Well I haven't read that, either.
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calebxy wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
calebxy wrote:
Err... ok. But what is it a fanfic of?
Harry Potter
Oh. Well I haven't read that, either.
I don't think it matters because she made every character in the story hordcar goffik u prepy prsun.
Last edited by soupoftomato (2012-02-20 15:29:21)
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soupoftomato wrote:
calebxy wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
Harry PotterOh. Well I haven't read that, either.
I don't think it matters because she made every character in the story hordcar goffik u prepy prsun.
Oh. Sounds good.
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I've changed the title of the story, you'll be pleased to hear. The Young Detectives Agency. Or I might call it The Babylon Gambit. But I think I'll just use that one for a chapter title.
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I agree. I'll go with that, then.
Last edited by calebxy (2012-02-21 04:29:53)
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Interesting story so far.
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ProgramCAT wrote:
Interesting story so far.
Thank you.
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