Scratch

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:06:34

I'm trying to write a good story, but I can't get the gore down.

Right now, it sounds like this: He cuts open his stomach, rips his guts out, and skips rope with them.

Needs to be better, though.

Something that can almost make you throw up a little.

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:07:02

What tells me this topic will get closed?

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:07:35

Wickimen wrote:
What tells me this topic will get closed?

Dunno?

veggieman001 · 2011-12-24 12:07:44

Uh why do you need this?

And this reminds me of my song "Cut Me Open".

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:08:36

veggieman001 wrote:
Uh why do you need this?

And this reminds me of my song "Cut Me Open".

I want to be a better writer.

veggieman001 · 2011-12-24 12:09:59

owetre18 wrote:
veggieman001 wrote:
Uh why do you need this?

And this reminds me of my song "Cut Me Open".
I want to be a better writer.

No but why do you need to describe gore and why does your character even do this and how do they do it without dying

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:10:01

Okay well
"Guts" is kind of vague and overused. Which ones? And how does one go about skipping rope with them anyway? Are they long and stringy guts? Does he twist them together in knots like braiding grass? But aren't they too slimy and, well, thick?

Last edited by Wickimen (2011-12-24 12:11:35)

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:11:03

veggieman001 wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
veggieman001 wrote:
Uh why do you need this?

And this reminds me of my song "Cut Me Open".
I want to be a better writer.
No but why do you need to describe gore and why does your character even do this and how do they do it without dying

Oh
I assumed that he ripped out somebody else's guts
Now I'm confused.

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:12:00

Wickimen wrote:
Okay well
"Guts" is kind of vague. Which ones? And how does one go about skipping rope with them anyway? Are they long and stringy guts? Does he twist them together in knots like braiding grass? But aren't they too slimy and, well, thick?

Okay. Here: He cuts open the victim's stomach. Nice, he thinks. He takes his large intestine out, holds each end in his hands, and skips rope with them. Then, he decides he needs a hat. He takes out his knife, and slowly slides it over the skull of the broken body, tearing off his scalp. He puts it on his head.

Last edited by owetre18 (2011-12-24 12:12:57)

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:13:36

owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
Okay well
"Guts" is kind of vague. Which ones? And how does one go about skipping rope with them anyway? Are they long and stringy guts? Does he twist them together in knots like braiding grass? But aren't they too slimy and, well, thick?
Okay. Here: He cuts open the victim's stomach. Nice, he thinks. He takes his large intestine out, holds each end in his hands, and skips rope with them.

A smile flits across his lips and his fingers stroke the snakelike brown coils. Faint music rings in his ears... 'Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack'... his sister always sang. Slowly he started, then quicker, skipping rope...

LOL it's a bit gross and absurd

rufflebee · 2011-12-24 12:13:58

gross

this is the kind of thing you just imply is terrible so the reader can imagine up the worst possible thing on their own

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:14:46

Wickimen wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
Okay well
"Guts" is kind of vague. Which ones? And how does one go about skipping rope with them anyway? Are they long and stringy guts? Does he twist them together in knots like braiding grass? But aren't they too slimy and, well, thick?
Okay. Here: He cuts open the victim's stomach. Nice, he thinks. He takes his large intestine out, holds each end in his hands, and skips rope with them.
A smile flits across his lips and his fingers stroke the snakelike brown coils. Faint music rings in his ears... 'Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack'... his sister always sang. Slowly he started, then quicker, skipping rope...

LOL it's a bit gross and absurd

That was awesome.

*insert clapping psyco-murderer here*

You are quite good at this.

veggieman001 · 2011-12-24 12:15:18

rufflebee wrote:
gross

this is the kind of thing you just imply is terrible so the reader can imagine up the worst possible thing on their own

I agree.
Write like Lemony Snicket.

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:15:25

owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
owetre18 wrote:

Okay. Here: He cuts open the victim's stomach. Nice, he thinks. He takes his large intestine out, holds each end in his hands, and skips rope with them.
A smile flits across his lips and his fingers stroke the snakelike brown coils. Faint music rings in his ears... 'Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack'... his sister always sang. Slowly he started, then quicker, skipping rope...

LOL it's a bit gross and absurd
That was awesome.

*insert clapping psyco-murderer here*

You are quite good at this.

My friends in real life always say there's something wrong with me smile

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:15:47

rufflebee wrote:
gross

this is the kind of thing you just imply is terrible so the reader can imagine up the worst possible thing on their own

I'm writing a script for a movie. Needs to be very real. Or just a very descriptive story.

ProgrammingFreak · 2011-12-24 12:16:25

He cut open his stomach, and ripped his guts out as they start too ooze. As the blood gushed out, he skips rope with them.

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:17:03

Wickimen wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
A smile flits across his lips and his fingers stroke the snakelike brown coils. Faint music rings in his ears... 'Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack'... his sister always sang. Slowly he started, then quicker, skipping rope...

LOL it's a bit gross and absurd
That was awesome.

*insert clapping psyco-murderer here*

You are quite good at this.
My friends in real life always say there's something wrong with me

Same here.

Want a redbull?

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:17:40

owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
owetre18 wrote:

That was awesome.

*insert clapping psyco-murderer here*

You are quite good at this.
My friends in real life always say there's something wrong with me
Same here.

Want a redbull?

I wouldn't
I'm already too energetic today tongue

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 12:18:28

Wickimen wrote:
owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:

My friends in real life always say there's something wrong with me
Same here.

Want a redbull?
I wouldn't
I'm already too energetic today

I've never had coffee, redbull, or sugar today, and I'm bouncing around where I sit.

And, no, I don't have ADHD.

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:19:54

owetre18 wrote:
Wickimen wrote:
owetre18 wrote:

Same here.

Want a redbull?
I wouldn't
I'm already too energetic today
I've never had coffee, redbull, or sugar today, and I'm bouncing around where I sit.

And, no, I don't have ADHD.

Same
I haven't had breakfast today
I just type faster when I'm energetic, and my fingers start drumming, etc
Maybe that's why the keyboard tray keeps falling out.

echs · 2011-12-24 12:26:48

Don't say anything directly; imply everything

rufflebee · 2011-12-24 12:27:42

echs wrote:
Don't say anything directly; imply everything

thats what i said >:I

Wickimen · 2011-12-24 12:29:28

IMO, writing gore is completely distasteful
But I still had fun with that bit hahaha

owetre18 · 2011-12-24 13:18:14

Well, bump.

nightmarescratcher · 2011-12-24 13:19:12

Wickimen wrote:
Okay well
"Guts" is kind of vague and overused. Which ones? And how does one go about skipping rope with them anyway? Are they long and stringy guts? Does he twist them together in knots like braiding grass? But aren't they too slimy and, well, thick?

*HURL*

Scratch

archived forums

#1 2011-12-24 12:06:34

How to describe good gore?

#2 2011-12-24 12:07:02

Re: How to describe good gore?

#3 2011-12-24 12:07:35

Re: How to describe good gore?

Wickimen wrote:

#4 2011-12-24 12:07:44

Re: How to describe good gore?

#5 2011-12-24 12:08:36

Re: How to describe good gore?

veggieman001 wrote:

#6 2011-12-24 12:09:59

Re: How to describe good gore?

owetre18 wrote:

veggieman001 wrote:

#7 2011-12-24 12:10:01

Re: How to describe good gore?

#8 2011-12-24 12:11:03

Re: How to describe good gore?

veggieman001 wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

veggieman001 wrote:

#9 2011-12-24 12:12:00

Re: How to describe good gore?

Wickimen wrote:

#10 2011-12-24 12:13:36

Re: How to describe good gore?

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

#11 2011-12-24 12:13:58

Re: How to describe good gore?

#12 2011-12-24 12:14:46

Re: How to describe good gore?

Wickimen wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

#13 2011-12-24 12:15:18

Re: How to describe good gore?

rufflebee wrote:

#14 2011-12-24 12:15:25

Re: How to describe good gore?

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

#15 2011-12-24 12:15:47

Re: How to describe good gore?

rufflebee wrote:

#16 2011-12-24 12:16:25

Re: How to describe good gore?

#17 2011-12-24 12:17:03

Re: How to describe good gore?

Wickimen wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

#18 2011-12-24 12:17:40

Re: How to describe good gore?

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

#19 2011-12-24 12:18:28

Re: How to describe good gore?

Wickimen wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

#20 2011-12-24 12:19:54

Re: How to describe good gore?

owetre18 wrote:

Wickimen wrote:

owetre18 wrote:

#21 2011-12-24 12:26:48

Re: How to describe good gore?

#22 2011-12-24 12:27:42

Re: How to describe good gore?

echs wrote:

#23 2011-12-24 12:29:28

Re: How to describe good gore?

#24 2011-12-24 13:18:14