Scratch

You TELL me your age, and I SHOW you how many germs are in your body since the day you were born!

Or, here's the equation if you love math, like me!

x=(age+1)*365
germs=(x(-0.75))^4+x(3)^3+5

That means, in words, x multiplied by negative zero point seventy-five to the fourth power plus x multiplied by three cubed plus five.

For example, I'm 13 in 10 days,

(13+1)*365
=14*365
=5110.
5110*(-0.75)=-3832.5.
-3832.5^4
=215738996403164.0625
=215738996403164.0625+(5110*3^3)
=3602686437000
=3602686437000+215738996403164.0625+5
=3602686437005+215738996403164.0625
=219341682840169.0625

And, unfortunately, I have over 100 trillion germs in my body.