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#51 2011-02-23 01:08:14

helltank
Scratcher
Registered: 2010-05-21
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

One of the best Singaporean jokes:

What's a meter long, red, lives underground and eats rocks?
A meter long red rock eater who lives underground.

If someone dug an endless hole and drop a boulder into it, how far would it fall?
A meter. After that the meter long red rock eater who lives underground eats it.

--------------------
One day a school teacher told her class,"We call you the Strawberry Generation because you are like strawberries. Soft on the outside and on the inside." A boy raised his hand. "But teacher, I hate strawberries. I'm a durian(huge, spiked fruit)!"
(Only Singaporeans will get it.)
---------------------

Now for some normal, non singaporean jokes.

3 men were talking about which of their occupations were the oldest. The surgeon said,"The first operation was when God took Adam's rib and made it into Eve." The engineer said,"The first engineering product was when God created Earth out of the endless chaos." The politician said,"Ah! But who made the chaos?"

-----------------
2 boys were arguing about a word. "It's windscreen," said the American boy. "No, no, it's windshield." said the English boy. The American boy said,"We invented the car, we should know." The English boy snapped,"But who invented the language?"


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#52 2011-02-24 09:00:19

geohendan
Scratcher
Registered: 2009-08-06
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

lol, I don't see why anyone didn't think of this:

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the KFC.

Well, It makes no sense, but it's funny.  lol


Scratching that nasty wart on my back since 2009!
http://i.imgur.com/OzpGtWV.jpg

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#53 2011-02-24 09:02:50

08jackt
Scratcher
Registered: 2007-09-12
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

okay prepare for the greatest one of all time seriously.

"What's a pirates favorite letter?'
"...R?!"
"RRRRR, YOU B' WRONG IT BE THE C"

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
no stealsies


http://i39.tinypic.com/jgtswi.png

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#54 2011-02-25 03:01:50

werdna123
Scratcher
Registered: 2010-06-12
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

I've got one. I'm not sure if the joke's exactly like this but I'll give it a go.

Bill Gates was going up to heaven and found that he had a nice small house. He decided to look around and found a house much larger than his. He decides do ask the owner how he/she managed to get such a house. So he meets the owner and asks, "What did you do to get such an amazing house?". "Ah, I was the captain of the Titanic!" "Wow, but didn't it crash?" "Yes," he replies, "but the Titanic only crashed once."

-----------------------

It's supposed to be making fun of Windows.  tongue

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#55 2011-02-25 03:51:05

BlahBlahRatSheep
Scratcher
Registered: 2010-11-07
Posts: 500+

Re: Show off your best jokes

I will try. But my jokes aren't laughable[ and don't make sense.]. >_>

"knock,knock"
"Who's there?"
"Who"
"Who,who?"
"I never knew you were half owl."
"What?Who I never knew you were half owl?"
"I guess the other half's parrot"

---

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"
"Cause it saw you"

----

A guy walked into a bar, the bar said "Hey, watch it!". Then the guy ran away.

----
[I might add more weird jokes] >_>


"and knew ones will come and they will get poopular then theyll leave and more pooples will get poopular." -soupoftomato
http://i405.photobucket.com/albums/pp132/kimchi_and_chowder/lolicon.gif Lovely day to air out my tongue, yes?

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#56 2011-02-25 03:58:17

ssss
Scratcher
Registered: 2007-07-29
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

why did the cat cross the webs?

To get to scratch, of course


Hey.  It's me SSSS, back from the dead!  smile

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#57 2011-02-25 08:39:19

werdna123
Scratcher
Registered: 2010-06-12
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

Two tall men walked into a bar. The third went under it.

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#58 2011-03-03 22:46:10

BoltBait
Scratcher
Registered: 2009-03-09
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

The barman says, "Sorry, we don't serve time travelers here."

A time traveler walks into a bar.


Animated sigs must be banned!
http://boltbait.com/j.pnghttp://boltbait.com/s.pnghttp://boltbait.com/d.pnghttp://boltbait.com/a.pnghttp://boltbait.com/p.png

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#59 2011-03-04 09:57:50

Maygenr
Scratcher
Registered: 2010-09-23
Posts: 100+

Re: Show off your best jokes

kayybee wrote:

Pretty good joke, I've heard it before, but I just don't know what a spainging is.

You don't know what a spanking is??? A spanking is where someone slaps your bottom... You didn't need to know that, and you don't want to try it... Trust me...

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#60 2011-03-04 10:06:30

08jackt
Scratcher
Registered: 2007-09-12
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

BoltBait wrote:

The barman says, "Sorry, we don't serve time travelers here."

A time traveler walks into a bar.

LOL
using that


http://i39.tinypic.com/jgtswi.png

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#61 2011-03-04 10:12:43

fg123
Scratcher
Registered: 2008-11-13
Posts: 1000+

Re: Show off your best jokes

A taxi driver was driving in the lone night. He spotted a single man, in the middle of the street. The man waved down the taxi and got in. He didn't say anything, so the driver just kept driving. When the driver turned around, the man had disappeared! The driver quickly put on the brakes and looked back again, the man has appeared again. There was a little blood on his forehead. The driver was shocked, but just kept driving, he looked back again and he had disappeared! This happened 5 more times before the driver asked him:

"Dude, how do you do that?"
The passenger replied: "I'm trying to tie my SHOELACE, but you keep braking. I keep hitting my head on your seat!"

big_smile   lol  HILARIOUS JOKE.


Hai.

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